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i just returned home after the usc-stanford drubbing at stanford stadium. it was, as all stanford games have been this year, an extremely sobering experience.there was a time when we were actually competitive on the field. stanford fans today now refer to the tyrone willingham years as “the good years”. we may have lost some games back then, but we NEVER got embarrassed. but these years under buddy teevens and walt harris have been truly debilitating as a stanford fan. it has been so atrocious, that a column in the san jose mercury news this week suggested that it’s a good thing because it’s SO bad that our administration will need to consider relaxing admissions standards.in any other situation, such a column would make me respond in a heated email to the writer, but this season has been so painful that the column actually made me pause for thought. after all, i used to resort to the same silly comebacks that stanford fans tend to use when we lose any sort of game. choose one of the following:1. we’re smarter than you
2. you’re winning because you let mentally deficient “student”-athletes into your school
3. you’ll work for me one day
4. you’re attending one of our safety schools

these spiteful remarks are simply a result of frustration most years. just stupid comments that come from the pain of losing. but this year’s football team has been so embarrassing that stanford fans look like complete jackasses when they say these things, no longer just frustrated and disappointed fans. we’re not competitive. we’re not frustrated because we lost the game. it is way beyond frustration. it’s just pure embarrassment.

our team is so embarrassing that, for any reasonable stanford fan, it outweighs any director’s cup trophy that we win for the umpteenth year. i want my football team to win games, i don’t want to tell people how we have “the best overall sports program in the country,” because i honestly don’t give a shit about that anymore. actually, scratch that, i just want my football team to be decent enough that i actually want to defend them when someone rags on them. i want them to be decent enough that i don’t wish i hadn’t spent $90 (a tiny amount) on season tickets. most of all? i want them to be decent enough that i don’t feel like a +23 point spread is a lock for the other team, every week.

so what should we do, as a school. open up our academic floodgates like so many other schools, as wilner suggested in the mercury column? no thank you. i still enjoy being able to laugh when ignorant sportscasters talk about how notre dame and stanford are on the same academic level (as tyrone said WHILE he was coaching the irish, that is preposterous). but i don’t think it’s unreasonable to have a competitive team without giving up academic standards. after all, didn’t we go to a few bowl games just a few years ago?

i’m tired of trying to come up with excuses for the pitiful nature of our football team. every game looks worse and every season looks more disappointing. i just want a decent team. not even a good team (right now), just a decent one. otherwise we might as well join the ivy league. stanford football: stop making me sick.

edit: just as i finished this post, the stanford-usc lowlights came on abc. i turned off the tv.